As of right now, President Donald John Trump (aka 92, because 45 + 47) appears to have the Electoral College votes (EV since it isn’t an actual college) needed to secure the 2024 Presidential election. After a much needed but entirely too brief nap, Wisconsin has been called by a reliable source, which puts Trump over the 270 needed (of 538 total).

This is after they tried to steal his businesses and property, throw him in prison and even (TWICE, that we know of…so far) kill him.

The unfinished earlier version of this story mentioned how some sources had already called the race, such as the completely unreliable and totally gutless Faux Snews (with Paul RINO Ryan running things, rather than the more than 7 years deceased Roger Ailes who would still do a better job), but at the time of that writing, Trump had just 248 of the 270 needed (and the 312 we predict he will end up winning).

The New York Times (aka New York Slimes) are alt-far-left-communists, but they have the absolute best election coverage, never calling too early or too late (and you know we like things ‘Just Right’ here), so we always have their auto-reloading page open on election night and into the wee hours of the next morning, while watching the “Real America’s Voice” streaming channel. At least until emergency nap time.

In addition, Trump was then ahead in: Michigan (15 EV) by 294,976 with 19% left to count, Wisconsin (10 EV) by 122,835 with 10% left, Nevada (6 EV) by 54,401 with 26% left, Arizona (11 EV) by 31,223 with 42% left, and Alaska (3 EV) by 27,994 with 45% to be counted, so he needed any ONE of those to put him past 270, and Alaska hasn’t voted democRAT for POTUS in 6 decades, which even their NEW ‘ranked-choice’ communism shouldn’t prevent, although that IS what it is intended to do.

Fun Fact: Any time democRATs alter how we vote, it is to make it more difficult or confusing, even if that isn’t how it appears at the time of introduction.

One person, one vote, on paper, in person, with valid state-issued ID AND signature matched. How hard is that?! And if we aren’t going to match signatures, as we didn’t during the 2020 election theft (yes, it was, stop being an election-theft denier), then why do the local board of elections (aka bored of elections) keep them on file…? Gotcha, leftists!

Anyway, Kamala (pronounced like Camel with an A at the end, because fuck her, figuratively) was ahead in only ONE state left to be called: Maine with a 51,099 lead and 29% left to be counted…for the 2 at-large EV left to be decided (Maine and Nebraska each have 2 at-large EV, plus 2 district EVs for Maine and 3 for Nebraska). So, basically, she had to win every EV left, while being very behind in almost all of them.

And since she was refusing to concede, by her own definition, that makes her an election denier. Gotcha again, leftists!

Just as President Trump came out to claim victory, pre-nap, they (NYT) finally called Pennsylvania, which added 19 Electoral College votes to his total, giving him 267 of the needed 270. That is when, despite coffee, we decided it was safe for some quick shut-eye.

Besides napping, just where have we been? Grieving. But we are back now. And they would have been SO happy with this outcome!

As good as the results are, democRATs and lamestream media (aka leftstream media, aka mainstream media[SIC]) have repeatedly told us, none of that matters. Most of all the nap.

Hey! If we’ve given you a giggle, or you’ve learned something you didn’t know, or you just want some cool talking points that you can use to torment that jackhole relative who ‘refuses to discuss politics’ but then leaves your TV on CNN when they depart, please consider donating. As much as we would like to say that the site pays for itself via ad money, the truth is that most of you block ads. And we understand! But getting 0.000582192 cents per view isn’t cutting it, and although we won’t beg, we will strongly encourage you to use the methods (Buy Me A Coffee, and/or Donorbox, currently) found all over the site. We would honestly like nothing better than to spend each day creating new content for you, so won’t you please help make our dream of perpetually sitting and typing become a reality? Thank you. –MG

No, what actually matters is the ‘popular vote’, which is why the United States has NEVER, not even once, elected a President that way, EVER! And Trump is SO unpopular that he is leading that by 5,091,811 votes there…so suck on that, bitches.

Jokes aside, Trump would have done this to Usurper in Thief (aka ‘Resident’) Joe Biden too. You can partially thank non-White patriots for this result, as 15% of blacks, 40% of hispanics and 39% of other non-White races voted for Trump, which are all higher than Republicans running for POTUS normally get. And to those folks we say, welcome home!

There is other good news for America too. Republicans have won the U.S. Senate, as with 7 seats left to be decided in the 100 seat chamber, they had already won 51 and lead in 5 others (2 by slim margins).

Also, with 70 U.S. House seats left to be decided (out of 435), Republicans need just 25 to control that chamber. Plus, we also still control 27 of 50 state Governor seats.

Now, if we can just keep the RINO’s from fucking things up like they did in 2017 when they blocked the MAGA agenda in the House, then Paul Ryan handed the House over to Nancy Pelosi (she of the perverted husband) by running an intentionally bad campaign!

To save America, we in MAGA (Make America Great Again) need to adopt the Cobra Kai motto: Strike first. Strike hard. No mercy.

That is NOT a call to violence! We start by prosecuting all those involved in the 2020 election theft AND in the cover-up of same, then move on to the vetting, hiring and training of actual Americans to locate and remove illegal aliens from the USA.

Oh, and we finish the border wall. Combined, those would be the greatest job creation program in history. Make it so!

And to Drat Smudge of the Smudge Abort…we are enjoying every bit of your mental pain you twisted evil piece of leftist shit.

This afternoon, Sunday, July 21, 2024, to the surprise of everyone who had been saying he wouldn’t do it…and ONLY to them…, Joe Biden (and his body double) announced he (they) will not run for his (their) first term as U.S. President, after successfully stealing the 2020 election from Donald Trump (yes, they did), who is now seeking his 3rd term (second served).

President Trump was leading on the evening of Tuesday, November 3, 2020, when the DC Uniparty (aka original DCU, made up of democRATs and RINOs; Republicans In Name Only) realized they were going to lose and stopped counting in states, counties, cities and districts that they controlled. Then, magically, when they restarted counting hours to days later, Trump was suddenly losing. Ditto MAGA candidates for U.S. Senate (one was John James in Michigan), U.S. House, and others too.

Just four years earlier, on Tuesday, November 8, 2016, they tried to prevent Trump from becoming President by delaying the announcement of election results in Pennsylvania. Then after 90 minutes or so, when they couldn’t figure out how to steal it and with even the New York Times election website showing fewer votes to count than Trump was leading Hillary Clinton by, they finally declared him the winner of PA, and therefore the Presidency.

Fast-forward to 2020 and, thanks to communist Chinese ‘the covid’ and the newly invented ‘mail-in ballots’ (where they just sent them to every address, including vacant lots, and to everyone, including dead people and illegal aliens), rather than ‘absentee voting’, that requires a request, proper ID (including date or birth, last 4 of SS#, and a signature which is verified upon receipt at the Board of Elections), and a chain on custody, PLUS electronic voting machine fraud, the election was quite easy to steal.

Effectively, the alt-far-left-communist-democRATs got their assassination after all, only 8 days late. It just ended up being the Joe Biden presidential candidacy instead of his opponent.

Hey! If we’ve given you a giggle, or you’ve learned something you didn’t know, or you just want some cool talking points that you can use to torment that jackhole relative who ‘refuses to discuss politics’ but then leaves your TV on CNN when they depart, please consider donating. As much as we would like to say that the site pays for itself via ad money, the truth is that most of you block ads. And we understand! But getting 0.000582192 cents per view isn’t cutting it, and although we won’t beg, we will strongly encourage you to use the methods (Buy Me A Coffee, and/or Donorbox, currently) found all over the site. We would honestly like nothing better than to spend each day creating new content for you, so won’t you please help make our dream of perpetually sitting and typing become a reality? Thank you. –MG

Thomas Matthew Crooks, a full-fledged adult at age 20 despite what some others are claiming, was the one with the gun, but let’s not pretend he was the mastermind behind trying to kill President Trump on July 13, 2024, in Butler, Pennsylvania, at a MAGA (Make America Great Again) rally after their lawfare attempts to get rid of him failed. The DCU may want to sweep Crooks and the entire event under the rug via rigged ‘investigations’, but we won’t let them.

In another blow against democracy[SIC], which is actually two wolves and a sheep voting on what is for lunch, as opposed to our Republic (where sheep have 2A rights), with the democRAT Primary having ended June 8, 2024, with Joe Biden being the winner, the so-called elite will now introduce the illusion of a modified selection process and then select the democRAT candidate.

democRATs really are the least ‘democRATic’ party ever.

This is all a result of Barack Obama grabbing control of the democRAT party from the Clinton’s in 2008 and never letting go, ever. He was even the first president to leave office and purchase a home in the Washington, DC, area. He then installed Biden to continue his own planned destruction of the United States by orchestrating the 2020 election theft, and now he has decided it was time for Joe to go.

Some supporters are trying to shift to the cackling shrew Kamala ‘heels up’ Harris, who in 2020 stole the Vice Presidency (yes, she did). But others are scrambling to join the race, and the first of those is current U.S. Senator Joe Manchin (D is for dip-shit, West Virginia), but he won’t be the last.

The bottom line is that leftists will do anything to stop the MAGA movement and to take out the founder and current leader, President Donald Trump, and complete their destruction of the USA. We can’t let them do that either.