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Governing By Firefly, Globalist Policies Nearly Follow ‘The Laws of My Administration’ From Duck Soup To The Letter

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'us and them', by unknown from Turning Point USA, UL by anonymous, via imgflip.com. Laws and rules should apply to everyone evenly. Lady Justice is blindfolded so she can't see who comes before her to be judged!
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Our recently rediscovering the Marx Brothers has been refreshing. They were master’s of innuendo, but never needed to actually ‘work blue’ to be funny. Take that, Kevin Hart, you unfunny loud obnoxious tiny thing you.

While re-watching these masterclasses of comedy, even the worst of the bunch, there are always some good jokes.

There were six brothers, but the oldest (Manfred) died as a baby, and his first name was later used as the middle name for last-brother-born Zeppo.

The ones people know of, born 2nd to 6th, were: Chico (Leonard), Harpo (Adolph; he never liked that and changed it to Arthur before the first world war, so LONG before Hitler was a thing), Groucho (Julius), Gummo (Milton) and Zeppo (Herbert).

‘Oh the hypocrisy, by frankyv23, via memedroid.com. He left out cutting off his penis or a girl cutting off her breasts well before 21 being okay with democRATs.

The 5 surviving brothers only worked together ONE time, at a show in Flint, Michigan (yes, but long before the lead contamination in the water there, which is still going on as of 2023). Flint has been using the old ‘non-partisan’ scheme since 1974. We lived in a city like that before. It is bullshit, and everyone sane knows it. democRATs control Flint!

Then, when Gummo left the act before it moved from vaudeville to Broadway, Zeppo joined full-time and stayed through their Broadway run and the 5th movie they made.

Now, the brothers were very obviously Jewish. Who cares? They were incredibly talented (all of them played at least one musical instrument, sang, danced, and told jokes).

‘Hypocrite’ by unknown from imgflip.com, UL by WOLFBLADE111 via deviantart.com. Women and so-called minorities are being wiped out…BY THE LEFT!

What does this have to do with politics?

Well, with being Jewish there usually, but doesn’t always, comes a certain kind of politics.

In fact, the only year since 1916 that the democRAT didn’t get most of the Jewish vote was 1920, when they jumped to the Socialist candidate (38%) over the democRAT (19%), with the same Republican candidate as 1916 getting 2 percent less (43%) in 1920 than they got 4 years earlier. These are numbers from a site of their own, as can be seen HERE.

Jewish people missed being slaves in Egypt SO much that they sold themselves to the democRAT party. Likewise, from 1870 to 1935, blacks voted for the party that freed them from slavery (Republicans) before deciding that they wanted to be slaves to democRATs again, and they have been since 1936. Congratulations.

‘Define hypocrisy in one meme.’, by 9GAGGER, via 9gag.com. ‘the covid’ was SO dangerous they had to be extra careful…while on camera.

Our standard disclaimer, we do NOT hate anyone…except communists and the communist adjacent. Hang out with commie dogs and you get commie fleas. We have no problem with, say, a gay Conservative black Jewish person. None at all. Really!

Seeing interviews of Groucho from the late 1960’s and early 1970’s he didn’t sound like a raving leftist, but he also didn’t sound like, well, us. Actually, he sounded tired.

But in this case, filmed decades earlier, his Duck Soup movie character, Rufus T. Firefly, is the kissing cousin of Occupier in Thief Joe of the Biden Usurpation, who is working overtime to channel Rufus.

‘Fake president, in a fake White House, receiving fake booster.’, by unknown via instagram.com, found on politifact.com[SIC] who said “Our research uncovered no evidence that the White House intended to mislead anyone by using the windows-and-white-columns background. The backdrop had already been used in one official event five days before Biden received his booster shot.” REALLY?! Despite the many protestations of ‘politifact'[SIC] they can NOT NOT NOT prove that is a real ‘the covid’ shot, and they know it. Also, Trump didn’t need a fake White House set, he just used the real White House. ‘politifact'[SIC] is the fraud, as is ‘stolen office’ Biden. Birds of a leftist feather, communism-ing together.

Duck Soup (1933) was the last of the 5 movies the then-billed ‘Four Marx Brothers’ made together as Zeppo then left the group, and it was also the last movie they made for Paramount. Today the movie is owned by Universal.

It is also the only movie that Chico (pronounced Chick-o, NOT Cheek-o; in the movies Harpo is always chasing girls around, but in real life Chico had a difficult time keeping it in his pants and was always on the prowl for chicks, aka ladies, hence the nickname) and Harpo did not play music in (piano and harp, respectively).

‘Duck Soup (2/10) Movie CLIP – The Laws of My Administration (1933) HD’, “Rufus T. Firefly (Groucho Marx) lays out the strict rules of his country through song and dance… much to everyone’s pleasure.” The last Marx Brothers movie (of 5) filmed at Paramount.

The basic premise of the movie is that a fictional country has debt and a rich widow will fund it but insists the current President vacate office for a “fearless progressive”, who then shows up late for his first day and quickly sings about how he will abuse his new power.

This key scene begins with a discussion (that then breaks into song) between his character and that of Margaret Dumont, whom Groucho referred to as “practically the fifth Marx brother.”, obviously forgetting about Gummo…and also baby Manfred…

Dumont was in 7 of the brother’s 13 movies, and always played a rich widow that Groucho professed love for one minute and viciously insulted the next.

‘Why are democrats the party of hatred?’, by Billy_Bob, via usmessageboard.com. The only things they don’t hate are abnormal, such as themselves.

She played that type of character very well because…she was a rich widow. She had left show business in 1910 to marry a sugar heir, and only returned to acting and singing when he died in 1918 during the Spanish Flu pandemic.

THAT one was actually deadly, without ‘help’ from Big Pharma and ‘mandates’.

And contrary to lore, including statements from Groucho himself, claims that she did NOT understand the jokes and didn’t realize they were directed at her (in character) were false. She had a strong comedic background before working with the brothers and was NOT stupid.

‘control’, “TRUMP 2020 NEUTER A DEMOCRAT ANTI DEMOCRAT MAGA DECAL STICKER POLITICAL”, by acdt*s via ebay.com. We don’t make anything from this, but we like the design so HERE is the link.

She herself said it took great effort to keep a straight face around them, as was required. Dumont described her job this way: “I’m not a stooge, I’m a straight lady. There’s an art to playing straight. You must build up your man, but never top him, never steal the laughs from him.” That she did very well.

We found a site with the lyrics HERE (there are some extra verses listed that are not in the movie too), and made ONE slight correction below, which we verified by watching the scene twice. As the song goes on, please take notice of Groucho actually doing or at least mimicking things he has just forbidden…just as modern democRATs do.

‘Ahh the hypocrisy’, by unknown from imgflip.com, UL by mikeygs1000rr, via reddit.com. We all know what a real and valid election looks like. 2020 and 2022 were NOT that!
SONG BEGINS
(Margaret Dumont as Mrs. Gloria Teasdale, first line spoken, and the rest are sung:)
If it's not asking too much,
For our information, just for illustration,
Tell us how you intend to run the nation.

(Groucho Marx as Rufus T. Firefly:)
These are the laws of my administration:
No one's allowed to smoke,
Or tell a dirty joke,
And whistling is forbidden.

(Ensemble:)
We're not allowed to tell a dirty joke.
HAIL, HAIL, FREEDONIA

(Groucho:)
If chewing gum is chewed,
The chewer is pursued,
And in the hoosegow hidden.

(Ensemble:)
If we should choose to chew,
We'll be pursued.

(Groucho:)
If any form of pleasure is exhibited,
Report to me and it will be prohibited.
I'll put my foot down; So shall it be
This is the land of the free.

The last man nearly ruined this place,
He didn't know what to do with it.
If you think this country's bad off now,
Just wait 'till I get through with it.

The country's taxes must be fixed,
And I know what to do with it,
If you think you're paying too much now,
Just wait 'till I get through with it.

I will not stand for anything,
That's crooked or unfair;
I'm strictly on the up and up,
So everyone beware.
If anyone's caught taking graft,
And I don't get my share,
We stand 'em up against the wall,    [that site mistakenly says "we'll" instead of "we"...]
And pop goes the weasel!

(Ensemble:)
So everyone beware,
Who's crooked or unfair;
No one must take a bit of graft,
Unless he gets his share.

(Groucho:)
If any man should come between,
A husband and his bride,
We find out which one she prefers,
By letting her decide.
If she prefers the other man,
The husband steps outside;
We stand him up against the wall,
and Pop goes the Weasel!

(Ensemble:)
The husband steps outside;
Relinquishes his bride;
We stand him up against the wall
And take him for a ride.
SONG ENDS
‘Uniting the nation against democrats’, by 9gagger, via 9gag.com. Indict Alvin Bragg NOW! HE is the one who belongs in prison!

Sound familiar? It should, because it is basically the policies of the current alt-far-left ‘Resident of Amerika’, Joe Biden. Now everything good and normal is frowned on and attacked, while perversion and evil are championed and normalized.

Leftists sexually and mentally abuse children and call it medical treatment. Everything from sports to music to beer has been twisted and subverted by the left. They already limited our freedom of movement AND assembly, and won’t hesitate to do so again.

‘roof’, by @SilentMemejority instagram.com. That woman really gets around.

In fact, the left questions every election they (despite their best efforts) fail to steal, and insists we can’t question the elections they actually succeed at stealing.

Even comedy has been ruined! We now have a guy facing 10 years in prison over a meme, but illegal alien (yes, she is, she lied to get into the USA) Ilhan Omar married her own brother AND had kids with him, yet democRATs accept that!

There are also those who believe that Joe has been replaced by a ‘body double’. Sound crazy?

“Fake biden’s”, by @LeftyCrypto via twitter.com, UL by 2020guy, via memedroid.com. They do all seem to have the same communist policies though.

Well, the left have accused Vladimir Putin, the Russian President, of the same thing! Other leaders have been accused too, both recently and in the past.

Some even question if Hitler actually died in his bunker. Regardless, ‘Joe’ doesn’t always act the same from event to event and has worn an earpiece since sometime in late 2015. The ‘dark Brandon’ nickname didn’t invent itself.

And, of course, the Biden Crime Family are the kings and queens of graft. He is also, with a little help from New York, ‘taking out’ his chief political opponent…just like Hitler and every other despot leader has done.

‘The Mirror Scene – Duck Soup (7/10) Movie CLIP (1933) HD’, “Pinky (Harpo Marx) pretends to be Firefly’s (Groucho Marx) reflection, matching his every move – until Chicolini (Chico Marx) ruins the effect.” Without the wigs (Chico and Harpo) and greasepaint (Groucho) they really did all look like…brothers. We love how when Groucho spins around Harpo realizes he can’t see him when backwards so he himself doesn’t spin. The last of 5 Marx Brothers movies made at Paramount.

Remember that they aren’t out to get Trump, he is just in the way of them getting us. Donald is an ‘inconvenient truth’, and we are now the resistance.

If we chew, then we will be pursued. Hail, hail, Freedonia! #Trump2024

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Parler is likely gone for good as of April 14, 2023.
Twitter account abandoned May 12, 2023, after Elon Musk hired WEF’er Linda Yaccarino as new CEO.

NOTE: We post new content regularly, and have a Comment section here in the shed (below every article), so please use it and help build the Reality community. If you enjoy our work please consider supporting Reality by using the “DonorBox” donation link, or the ‘Buy Me a Coffee‘ donation link…or both. Either way please bookmark us and help spread the word to family and friends. Thank you.

Politics

Largest Ever hispanic Simon Says Game Begins, mexican president amlo Strongly Suggests They All Vote Monolithically

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"Joke: Over the past few years, since Trump first talked about building the wall between Mexico and the United States, there has been an increase in depression among Mexicans. Mexican psychotherapists have reported that many Mexicans will never get over it.", by unknown, via themostlysimplelife.com. Good, they are losing sleep. Meanwhile, Americans are being murdered by illegal aliens.
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As of today there are 8.036 BILLION people on Earth, and approximately 486 MILLION people across 20 countries that speak spanish natively. In fact, it is the #4 most spoken language on Earth, behind #3 Hindi, #2 Mandarin Chinese, and #1…English.

Finding this out is shocking considering we are told every day to give up our identity and accept “Dial 2 for spanish’ on our phone calls to, well, every company in America.

“Don’t believe the fake Noose media!”, by Humornama Media, via humornama.com. The leftstream, or lamestream, media did collude with known racist scumbag leftist William Darrell ‘Bubba’ Wallace Jr. (white father, black mother; and neither raised him properly) and the FBI (aka Fascist Bureau of Investigation) on that noose story a few years ago…almost like nobody had even seen a rope garage door pull before. For those who don’t know, EVERY garage door at that racetrack had one, not just his.

We’ve even noticed that FREE streaming services, such as PlutoTV and others, now regularly run ads (you watch those rather than pay a monthly fee) in spanish, at all times of the day and on every channel.

Quick note: fuck you Paramount-CBS-Viacom…munist.

“Why july to me? Julier!!”, by Humornama Media, via humornama.com. AMLO and other globalists are Julier’s!

The totals, for those interested, are 1.452 BILLION for English, 1.118 BILLION for Mandarin Chinese, 602.2 MILLION for Hindi, and 548.3 for spanish.

Our standard disclaimer here: we don’t have anyone except communists, and those communist adjacent (which includes illegal aliens…the proper term for alien invaders under U.S. Law).

“Tell me if juicy the cops.”, by Humornama Media, via humornama.com. The same cops leftists want to eliminate.

Then it is quite a fall down to #5 French at 274.1 MILLION, #6 Arabic at 274.0 MILLION, #7 Bengali (India’s #2) at 272.7 MILLION, then #8 Russian at 258.2 MILLION, #9 Portuguese (spoken in Portugal, obviously, and Brazil, less obviously) at 257.7 MILLION, and #10 Urdu (spoken in Pakistan, and also parts of India) at 231.3 MILLION.

No other language clocks in at over 200 MILLION (at this time), and just 4 more (again, at this time) top 100 MILLION.

“I tried to go to American, but defense was in the way.”, by Humornama Media, via humornama.com. We don’t want a fence, we want a WALL!!!

For those wondering, there are 8 main spoken Chinese variants, and over 300(!!) different dialects of Chinese in China. The next two dialects of Chinese came in at #19 AND #22.

mexico has just under 3x as many spanish speaking people as Spain does (130.21 MILLION to 47.26 MILLION).

“Why did the Mexican take anxiety meds? For his His-panic attacks.”, by Humornama Media, via humornama.com. Good, they have the shakes. Meanwhile, Americans are being raped by illegal aliens.

Fun fact, we were curious and looked up…”The main difference between Spanish speakers in mexico and Spain is how they pronounce z, ci, and ce. In mexico and across Latin America, the pronunciation of z, ci, and ce in Spanish are all similar to the “s” sound in English. In Spain, they sound more like a breathy “th” sound.” –blog.rosettastone.com

Anyway, enough of that stuff.

“The doctor asked me which knee hurts that knee or disney?”, by Humornama Media, via humornama.com. Boycott that knee and Disney.

After centuries of insistence that all hispanics were NOT the same, mexican president andres manuel lopez obrador (aka amlo, as in amlodownglobalistscum) declared a few days ago that ALL hispanics are, apparently mexican AND have to do what he tells them to do, even if they live in another country.

“The doctor said I shouldn’t drink too much because it’s bad for deliver!”, by Humornama Media, via humornama.com. The least harmful thing that could happen to them is developing liver problems. That is too slow!

This pronouncement came as part of a larger attack by MANHOLE on Florida Governor Ron DeSantis, who lied when he said that if President Trump decided to run in 2024 then Ron would not run. That is okay though, as it will be fun to watch Donald humiliate a large group of RINOs and Paul Ryan friends (as Ron is; even taking advice from the former Speaker and current Fox News board member) again.

“My friend gets so drunk that I have to pick the bishop!”, by Humornama Media, via humornama.com. Call her a bish to her face and you won’t have that problem again…

Referring to Ron as “Mr. Santi”, AMMOdump stated that “all of his politicking about migrants was because he wants to be the candidate for the Republican Party.”, because pandering is apparently not a part of mexican politics…

First, they are NOT “migrants”. They are illegal alien invaders. Not just of the USA, but also of mexico and other countries too.

Second, fuck you communist.

“I want to go to the club but no body wash my child.”, by Humornama Media, via humornama.com. Where is your baby-mama?

SCAMPRO also said he hopes that hispanics, “wake up and don’t give him [DeSantis] a single vote” in the upcoming Republican primaries and presumably also in the possible 2024 general election, although President Trump will be the one to ensure that.

It is also Tony Montana’s intention to continue to tell hispanic Americans how to vote in the future, so they have a decision to make. And if they decide to side with his own special brand of terrorism (which is what his actions are), then they need to leave.

“Nando asked me hey bro do you think you cologne me a dollar?”, by Humornama Media, via humornama.com. Will you pay back the cologne?

Even legal hispanics are tired of illegal aliens, and especially ‘their own kind’, as the ones coming here aren’t saints (see HERE and HERE recently on MS-13, and HERE for illegal aliens in general).

CONBRO is also colluding with communist China to import Fentanyl (50x more potent than heroin, and 100x more potent than morphine) into the USA to kill Americans.

“I just wanted to stop by anguish you a happy birthday!”, by Humornama Media, via humornama.com. Stay in your own country and just tweet me best wishes.

That motherfucker also allows illegal alien invaders from countries to mexico’s south to just waltz through his country to enter ours. HE is a criminal and should be tracked down, arrested, and brought to the USA for a speedy trial and equally quick PUBLIC execution, as a warning to the next 10 generations that some actions come with too high a price.

“Today is not tuesday, it’s mande.”, by Humornama Media, via humornama.com. Mande was a pretty good day, but it is almost over now.

The fact is that white people, globally, have built modern society, and now we are expected to just hand it to third world invaders, then step aside and die. Not happening! And if you are all that and a bag of tortilla chips then stay home and fix your own shit-hole!

We want to thank ‘mexico hat guy’ for being here today (on a Mande), who, as it turns out, is the 17th cousin, 5 times removed, of our prior guest ‘Anti-Joke Chicken‘. Please, don’t ask.

You can find us on social media here:
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Parler is likely gone for good as of April 14, 2023.
Twitter account abandoned May 12, 2023, after Elon Musk hired WEF’er Linda Yaccarino as new CEO.

NOTE: We post new content regularly, and have a Comment section here in the shed (below every article), so please use it and help build the Reality community. If you enjoy our work please consider supporting Reality by using the “DonorBox” donation link, or the ‘Buy Me a Coffee‘ donation link…or both. Either way please bookmark us and help spread the word to family and friends. Thank you.

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Politics

Wipe With democRATs!, The Ultimate Solution To Stopping Deforestation AND ‘Deleavestation’ While Also Saving Money

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'...not buying...', by unknown, via digitalmomblog.com. This really is a no-brainer, and comes down to comfort and price.
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We really do listen to you and read your comments, and we always consider your suggestions…before dismissing them. Unfortunately for you, no, we won’t be starting an OnlyFans account. Also, shame on those of you who want to see a scantily clad “10-year-old cartoon boy” researching and typing. THAT is a new kink!

As for the headline, it was a tossup between ‘ultimate’ and ‘perfect’, but in the end ‘ultimate’ was more better-er. Speaking of the end, this article is all about some leftist ass-hat suggesting that we do away with toilet paper (TP) and instead begin using leaves to wipe our butts with when we take a poop.

Translation into vulgarian: “using leaves to wipe our asses with when we take a shit”. We just want everyone to be happy, and appreciate our vulgarian minority readers. To that end, this article contains both toilet humor AND humor about toilets.

“you’re a true vulgarian” — from ‘A Fish Called Wanda’ (1988, MGM). This scene features Kevin Kline (as Otto) and John Cleese (as Archie). What comes next in the movie is Otto hanging Archie out of a window upside down.

Are we actually taking one or leaving it? You don’t bring the crap with you when you exit the bathroom. Actually, since we are leaving it, then perhaps we should use leaves.

Back on topic, who are the dirtiest and most disgusting people on the planet?

democRATs. But you know that, even if you are one. And if you are one, what the fuck are you doing here? There is no hope for you. Any chance you had of saving your soul was lost when you stole the 2020 and 2022 elections.

Yes, you did.

The real question isn’t if we should continue to use TP, but rather what are we going to use when democRATs finish intentionally collapsing society?

This kind of nonsense from the alt-far-left isn’t new though. The globalists tried to create an artificial shortage of TP during the covid scamdemic of 2020 (aka that thing that enabled the first recent election theft).

This did get us thinking though. Perforated TP was patented in 1891, and we decided to learn about what people used before TP was invented.

‘public restroom usage’, by unknown, found online. Yet people still buy food at gas stations.

The first known reference to TP was in 589AD by the Chinese scholar and official Yan Zhitui, who said, “Paper on which there are quotations or commentaries from the Five Classics or the names of sages, I dare not use for toilet purposes.”

In islam they are not allowed to eat with their left hand…because they wipe with that hand after crapping (via rroij.com). THIS is the reason we shake hands with the right hand! According to wikipedia.com, male muslims “…must also not wear any scent, including deodorant.”

Well, that stinks.

Here are some other solutions to this common shared problem…

‘…literally…’, by unknown, via noguiltlife.com. Never did that ourselves, but most often it seemed to be aimed at government school indoctrinators (aka ‘teachers'[SIC]).

“How did Romans wipe their bottoms? The Romans cleaned their behinds with sea sponges attached to a stick, and the gutter supplied clean flowing water to dip the sponges in. This soft, gentle tool was called a tersorium, which literally meant “a wiping thing.” The Romans liked to move their bowels in comfort.” –smithsonianmag.com

“What did Vikings use as toilet paper? The waterlogged areas of the excavation at Whithorn uncovered preserved ‘sheets’ of moss, which had been discarded. Closer analysis revealed them to be studded with fragments of hazel nut shells, and blackberry pips.” –futuremuseum.co.uk

“What was toilet paper in China? In the 6th century CE toilet paper was widely used in China. Historically the first modern toilet paper was made in 1391, when it was created for the needs of the Chinese Emperor family. Each sheet of toilet paper was even perfumed. That was toilet paper as we have come to think of it.” –toiletpaperhistory.net

‘pre-2020 life’, by unknown, via noguiltlife.com. Those companies plant new trees too, because without them they’d run out of product eventually.

“What did people use instead of toilet paper in the Middle Ages? Before toilet paper was even a concept, people just used whatever was available to wipe. This included items such as hay, wood shavings, corn cobs, and even iron cables.” –bimbamboopaper.com

“What Did We Use Before Toilet Paper? Leaves, sticks, moss, sand and water were common choices, depending on early humans’ environment. Once we developed agriculture, we had options like hay and corn husks. People who lived on islands or on the coast used shells and a scraping technique.” –cottonelle.com

“What did pirates use for toilet paper? Sailors used something called a ‘tow rag’. A tow rag was a long piece of frayed rope that dangled in the water. The ropes were tied to the part of the ship that was used as a toilet. After wiping, they would drop the rope back into the water and let the ocean do the clean-up.” –cottonelle.com

‘…square’, by unknown, via digitalmomblog.com. The guy that sings the song this is based on is VERY left wing. Cute meme though.

“What did [American Indians] use before toilet paper? Corn cobs. Dried corn cobs were plentiful in rural agrarian societies throughout history. From colonial Americans to ancient Mayans — the corncob worked by turning on its axis to clean the region (you get the picture). According to our official internet sources, some outhouses in western US states still use this method” –whogivesacrap.org

“What did pioneers use to wipe their bum? One of the more popular early American wiping objects was the dried corn cob. A variety of other objects were also used, including leaves, handfuls of straw, and seashells. As paper became more prominent and expendable, early Americans began using newspapers, catalogs, and magazines to wipe.” –pristinesprays.com

“What did cowboys use for toilet paper? If the cowboys used the large velvety leaves of the mullein (Verbascum thapsus) plant while out on the range, then you can too! Mullein is a biennial plant available for use in almost every bioregion.” –hipcamp.com

‘…CVS…’, by unknown, via noguiltlife.com. CVS has nothing on Big Lots!

“What was used for toilet paper in the 1800’s? Before the availability of mass produced toilet paper in the mid-1800s, humans had to resort to using what was free and available, even if it didn’t provide the most effective (or comfortable) results. Options included rocks, leaves, grass, moss, animal fur, corn cobs, coconut husks, sticks, sand, and sea shells.” –nicencleanwipes.com

“What was toilet paper like in the 1860s? The first commercially packaged toilet paper was made in 1857 by Joseph Gayetty. The paper was wet with aloe and had his name printed on every sheet. It was sold as a medical product, and claimed to prevent hemorrhoids.” –reddiplumbingwichita.com

“What did civil war soldiers use for toilet paper? There was generally no toilet paper available. Soldiers used sheets of newspaper, pages from catalogs, or water from a canteen to clean themselves.” –civilwartalk.com

‘…wish…’, by unknown, via noguiltlife.com. We’ll pay with cash, thank you for asking.

Quite a lot of creative options there, but we will stick to TP and hope that it doesn’t stick to us.

But if push comes to shove, there is no shortage of leftists today, as colleges and government schools are designed to produce them, by taking perfectly normal human beings and brainwashing and gaslighting them into leftism.

‘crane’, by unknown, via digitalmomblog.com. Those things are SO rigged!

So our very reasonable and comprehensive solution to this problem is obviously the proper path to take. And anyway, who gives a shit if the left doesn’t like it, as they’ve been crapping on us for decades now.

What started this off was Robin Greenfield, an allegedly grown adult male of 36, who likes to refer to himself as an “environmental activist”. Actually, so-called environmentalists are not environmentalists, they are environmental EXTREMISTS pushing a Marxist agenda. Nobody normal hates the environment! NOBODY!!

‘…one carat…’, by unknown, via digitalmomblog.com. We came close once, and will likely visit this territory again.

We ALL like clean water, and clean air, and also radiation as low as possible (seriously, if you dislike radiation, then Earth is the last place you want to be, since we are bombarded by solar radiation 24/7/365, as even if you are on the side not facing the Sun, solar radiation goes right through the planet, through you and out into space).

Greenfield claims we have an “environmental crisis”, but we really have a crisis of environmentalist wackos wanting us to be regressive while claiming they are progressive. Wanting us to live in boxes, while doing away with normal cars for EVs (HERE, HERE, HERE and HERE), and eliminating gas stoves are just three more examples of the left’s regressivism.

‘…seeds…’, by unknown, via noguiltlife.com. Gives a new definition to grow your own.

The plant (blue spur flower) that he suggests we use instead of the plant we already use (aka trees, which provide the pulp for all forms of paper as we know it) grows in just 11 States, so the other 39 States worth of us would just be…wait for it…totally worth it…almost there…shit out of luck.

Told you so.

‘Here Goes Nothing’, by Dana Jean Taylor @danajeantaylor from pinterest.com, via memebase.cheezburger.com. It takes a while for it to sprout, so be patient.

Robin also failed to explain what would happen to Taco Bell in a TP-less society, as “mud-butt” is a real disease and they are a known cause.

We recently brought together a crack team of specialists, or was it a specialist team on crack, or even a team of crack specialists…anyway, we consulted with the best folks we could find: Hugh Jast, Richard Hertz, Nate Yuri and Irving Phillip Frehley (who claims to be a distant cousin of original ‘Kiss’ guitarist Paul Daniel ‘Ace’ Frehley, but we have our doubts).

“History Lessons – Chappelle’s Show”, the mud-butt part of the first 6:05 of this video. By somewhat reasonable and occasionally on our side despite being muslim, Dave Chappelle, and completely unreasonable communists Comedy Central [SIC]. RIP Charlie Murphy. You are still funnier than Eddie.

Their solution was to stuff TP down the throat of the guy who suggested we stop using it, then wrap him in TP and put him up in a tree with the other nuts. They didn’t specify if the TP was to be unused or not, and we have no preference either.

Our solution is to dump Robin and his lame-ass idea in the toilet bowl of history and flush. Also, crack is whack.

‘…take it’, by unknown, via digitalmomblog.com. Don’t Mess With Myass!

This is the crappiest article we will probably ever write, and we really just want the globalist left to leave us alone. There is a time and place for communism, and it is called China.

Next we will turn our attention to another top request, figuring out how to go fuck ourselves. Sounds like fun, AND also quite a challenge. Stay tuned.

You can find us on social media here:
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Parler is likely gone for good as of April 14, 2023.
Twitter account abandoned May 12, 2023, after Elon Musk hired WEF’er Linda Yaccarino as new CEO.

NOTE: We post new content regularly, and have a Comment section here in the shed (below every article), so please use it and help build the Reality community. If you enjoy our work please consider supporting Reality by using the “DonorBox” donation link, or the ‘Buy Me a Coffee‘ donation link…or both. Either way please bookmark us and help spread the word to family and friends. Thank you.

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Politics

Dying To Bring Your Food To You, We Told You That To Tell You This — MS-13 Murdered A Gig Driver In Satanic Ritual

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'...kept out...', by Frank-Lee, via imgflip.com. democRATs and RINOs know this, so the obvious answer to why they refuse to build a wall is...they want us all dead.
Spread the reality, RealityShed.Com --

Originally conceived of as ONE article, this all began as a story about a food delivery person killed by a member of MS-13. Then we heard about something else happening to a different driver, and then the family in Texas was murdered. You can find that first part of this now two part article HERE.

So, as we started to say, before we were so rudely interrupted…by life…there is an obvious love affair between democRATs and MS-13. Just as with blmantifa (or antifablm, if you prefer), MS-13 are used by the alt-far-left to terrorize Americans. And other criminals are obviously welcome to help out too.

The Biden Usurpation has pretty much destroyed the once booming Trump economy. It wasn’t difficult to do, and it was intentional. The left are NOT incompetent, as some on our side claim, but rather are in fact VERY good at being evil. So good in fact that some people still believe democRATs care about America and Americans.

“Calling an illegal alien an undocumented immigrant is like calling a meth dealer an undocumented pharmacist”, by unknown, from imgflip.com via hubpages.com. The conflation of those who things is 100% intentional by leftists. A misinformed populace is easier to trick and control.

Things have gotten so bad that despite fewer orders being placed because of the poor Bidenflation economy, well-meaning folks are still flocking to gig work (delivering food, groceries and other items to people) and further dividing up the lack of orders into ever smaller ‘pieces of the pie’.

Being as vague as possible while still being honest, having lost, at least for now, our own prior position due to the Biden regime’s attacks on people who are not globalist commies like themselves (people who paid us well to do work for them), we had been living off of savings for months, so to stem the bleeding we too have dabbled in gig work as well.

“Right now I’d do anything for money. I’d kill somebody for money. I’d kill you for money. Hahaha, ah no, you’re my friend…I kill you for nothing.”– Chico (Chico Marx) to Harpo (Harpo Marx) in ‘The Cocoanuts’ (1929).

Scene from ‘The Cocoanuts’ (1929), by Paramount, via rottentomatoes.com. Starring Chico Marx (ducking), Harpo Marx (standing, right) and with a special appearance by Groucho Marx’s left hand (left, ironically). This was the only picture we could find of Chico and Harpo together from this movie. In the described scene they are alone, and both are standing. This is the only movie where Harpo wears his original dark red ‘fright’ wig (from Vaudeville and Broadway). Even in B&W, it photographed too dark so he switched to light red for all other movies (hinted at by character names like ‘Rusty’ and ‘Pinky’), although that looked blond.

Yes, the screenwriters actually came up with character names for Groucho (Mr. Hammer) and Zeppo (Jamison; a name he also used in ‘Animal Crackers’, the next year…well, specifically, Horatio Jamison in that) but couldn’t think anything up for the other two brothers and used their regular stage names instead (and all four brothers were called their stage names in 1931’s ‘Monkey Business’, and in 1949’s ‘Love Happy’ Harpo was).

Okay, back on topic. Better to do something now when you don’t have to, than to wait until it is required. That is what adults do, even a 10-year-old cartoon boy. And we didn’t resort to murder, even for free.

Anyway, Title 42 ended Thursday, May 11, 2023. democRATs and MSM insist President Trump put Title 42 into place, but it was actually passed…GASP!…under FDR in 1944, as part of the Public Health Services Law.

“Facts abt pizza delivery: highest job fatality rate (police don’t even make top 10) -most pizzerias wont allow drivers to even carry a pocketknife on them -if a driver gets robbed it comes out of their tips -most car insurance agents dont cover “on job” collisions for them; einsturzende– love all these new memes, PIZZA DELIVERY IS TWICE AS DANGEROUS AS BEING A COP SALUTE THE REAL TROOPS”, by autumnrainy28_2013, via ifunny.co. This is, depending on source (position rank varies), basically true. More information below.

The left counters that Title 42 has been “rarely used” since then. That doesn’t change the fact that it was still Law. Then leftists switch to saying that Trump abused Title 42. Not as much as illegal aliens (and democRATs) abuse the immigration system.

What is/was Title 42? An emergency law allowing the government to prohibit illegal aliens from entering the USA in order to prevent the spread of communicable diseases.

How do we know they have contagious diseases?

Do you think ‘country burglars’ (what illegal aliens actually are) go to see doctors regularly? Really?!

‘Just one of MANY victims 1’, by unknown, via americancowboychronicles.com. Kayla Gomez-Orozco went missing during a prayer service at her Bullard, Texas, church, on November 1, 2016. An illegal alien, Gustavo Zavala-Garcia, was living in that city and her body was found in a water well on his property. He later pleaded guilty to capital murder in her death.

They are certainly more of a danger to society than a gun owner is. Why? Illegal aliens are ‘super spreaders’, and in more ways than one. BEFORE Title 42 ended, we had illegal aliens coming into the USA from over 50 different countries!

We are NOT bordered by 50 countries! We are bordered by TWO countries: Mexico and Canada. So how are they getting to Mexico and Canada to illegally enter the USA? Super-spreading!

But, according to the alt-far-left (including RINOs), our border does not matter. Which border does? Ukraine’s border, of course. That one they continue to find excuses to throw money at.

Our standard disclaimer: we are not pro-Russia or pro-Ukraine, we are solely pro-American. Deal with it.

‘Just one of MANY victims 2’, by unknown, via americancowboychronicles.com. Joshua Wilkerson deserved better than what the risky schemes of democRATs, RINOs, MSM and Hermilo Moralez gave him.

On Monday, April 24, 2023, a 30-year-old named Oscar Solis, who is an actual member of MS-13, and who had moved to Florida after his release on parole from prison in Indiana, was arrested by the Pasco County Florida Sheriff for the murder of Randall Cooke, who was delivering food on behalf of an unknown restaurant via Uber Eats at the time of his death on Wednesday, April 19, 2023.

And we said “on behalf of” because, contrary to popular belief, those who work gig jobs are NOT employees of those companies, but are in fact independent contractors (aka 1099 workers). They install an app on their phone, and when they log in they are sent ‘offers’, which they are free to accept or decline at their own discretion.

Sure, companies encourage drivers to take all offers, but it is NOT required, and in some cases it is downright silly to do so. We’ll probably discuss this in detail soon, but for now most drivers say that a $1 or more to 1 mile ratio is what you look for, because below that you are losing money since drivers use their own car, gasoline and time.

‘…Deported…’, by Americans for Legal Immigration PAC (aka ALIPAC.US), from William Gheen @ALIPAC via twitter.com. Since it happened, we have actually heard some leftists blame Mollie Tibbetts for her own murder. Nope, that was ILLEGAL ALIEN ‘farm worker’ Cristhian Bahena Rivera.

So $10 total (including what the app pays directly, and in tips from the customer) for 8 miles would be good, but $5 total for 11 miles would be ‘upside down’ and cost you money in the long run (oil changes and other maintenance aren’t free).

Cooke was a 59-year-old husband and stepfather who unfortunately decided to accept an ‘offer’ that took him to gang-member Solis’ home on what was meant to be his last delivery of the night (he had texted his wife he was heading home after dropping it off), but it instead turned into his last delivery ever.

Security camera footage shows Cooke going to Oscar’s front door. Randall had only decided to sign up to make deliveries so that his family could live in an ocean-side area as his wife and stepdaughter wished to do.

Meanwhile, Solis had failed to register as a convicted felon when he moved to Florida (which violated his parole).

‘Trump Is Right’, by Zalix512, via ingflip.com. Even rich professional athletes are not immune to illegal aliens killing them, so obviously WE are not safe either.

Police believe that Solis forced Cooke inside, then murdered Randall before dismembering his body and putting the pieces into garbage bags. Later, he received help taking those bags outside to garbage cans.

For the record, the user agreements of the delivery companies prohibit drivers from going inside a house or apartment, so please never do that voluntarily, even if you think it might be safe. You never know who is waiting around a corner with bad intent.

Police found blood and a wedding ring, both belonging to Cooke, inside Oscar’s home, then days later found the trash bags containing Cooke’s remains.

Solis’ many crimes before this brutal murder include a slew of drug offenses, aggravated battery (the difference with regular battery being these are more serious injuries requiring medical attention), repeated burglary charges, assault on prison staffers, stabbing another inmate while in prison, and resisting arrest.

‘legal VS illegal’, by Warrior XII, via Blue Lives Matter @bluelivesmtr on twitter.com. 32-year-old ILLEGAL ALIEN Gustavo Perez Arriaga shot and killed Officer Ronil Singh (a legal immigrant) during a traffic stop in Madera County, California, on Wednesday, December 26, 2018.

In other words, Solis is a solid democRAT citizen. And not that it should matter, but we will note it anyway, Solis is hispanic and Cooke was White.

Not to be outdone, around the same time, another Florida hoodlum, Joseph Killins…yes, KILLins, was charged with two attacks on women. The 38-year-old Killins is not known to be a member of MS-13, but apparently hates delivery drivers almost as much as Solis.

On Tuesday, April 18, 2023, Killins used a gun to kidnap a woman who was working on behalf of a restaurant through the DoorDash app, then made her drive (using her own car) to another area while committing sexual battery on her and with the likely intent of raping (if not also of killing) her.

Luckily, this victim, listed only as a 20-year-old hispanic woman, had been talking to someone on the phone when Killins approached her and she was tracked down by her family using a phone finding app. Killins shot his gun at them, hitting a woman in her 20’s before he fled.

“Joe ‘Illegal Immigration’ Biden”, by MoFuzzero13, via imgflip.com. Joe is a pedophile, which explains why he wants a steady flow of illegal alien kids brought into the USA.

The next day, Wednesday, April 19, 2023, Killins, who, for the record, is black, repeated his actions (minus the car part) with another hispanic woman, this time in her early 40’s, before stealing her backpack and fleeing. Police found him 4 miles away at a hotel and arrested him.

And we said Killins “hates delivery drivers” because sexual battery is a crime of violence, NOT a crime of sex.

Now those stats we promised earlier. According to ‘Industrial Safety & Hygiene News’ (ishn.com), the most dangerous job in the USA is logging, with 56 deaths in 2018 (or 111 per 100,000 workers).

Delivery drivers ranked 7th, with 966 deaths that year (at a rate of 27 per 100,000). The list includes the top 25, and police officers rank 22nd, with 108 fatalities (and a rate of 14 per 100,000 workers).

‘no different’, by DrSarcasm, via imgflip.com. Joe Biden = pedophile. Touch them? Sniff them? Shower with them? Worse?! The answer is worse. He has sex with them.

According to ISHN, working as a police officer is 4.1 times more dangerous than the average job, and again, the rate of deaths per 100,000 workers is almost twice as high (27 to 14) for delivery drivers.

So if you get good service, please tip the delivery people. They risk more than restaurant staff or even police. And please make sure your location address is clearly visible and, at night, well lit. Thank you!

You can start checking back here again. We have some hard-hitting stuff coming up, and you won’t have to wait 3 weeks between to read them either.

You can find us on social media here:
https://gab.com/MisterGoldiloxx
https://parler.com/MisterGoldiloxx
AND
https://gettr.com/user/realityshed
https://twitter.com/RealityShed
https://truthsocial.com/@RealityShed

Parler is likely gone for good as of April 14, 2023.
Twitter account abandoned May 12, 2023, after Elon Musk hired WEF’er Linda Yaccarino as new CEO.

NOTE: We post new content regularly, and have a Comment section here in the shed (below every article), so please use it and help build the Reality community. If you enjoy our work please consider supporting Reality by using the “DonorBox” donation link, or the ‘Buy Me a Coffee‘ donation link…or both. Either way please bookmark us and help spread the word to family and friends. Thank you.

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